1. Gamblers
5-1. fifth consecutive win and sits
atop the West. Interestingly, Gamblers only
loss is to the team 1 game behind them in
the standings so can’t take anything for
granted just yet.
2.
DDR
The other 5-1 team, 3-0 in their
division and a comfy 2-game lead over
Cellmates. Rico Dowdle has more rushing
yards in two games than Saquon Barkley does
in 6. Up next, a feisty Co’s Pros and Big Al
really hates being in between Klein and
Beckage in the standings…or any other venue.
3.
Horsemen
It’s a 4-2 threesome in the East
w/Horsemen at the top…for now. . Beckage
needed a good shower cry to wash away the
shame of the ass whoopin’ from DDR, and next
faces Gamblers. Maybe just get comfy on the
cold, wet tiled floor. Save yourself some
time.
4.
Incubus
Despite Klein doing Klein things,
it’s 3 straight dubs for team Mayfield for
MVP. Huge matchup against division opponent
Buffalo 66. If King Henry can get going
after the bye, Klein can make a legit
playoff push. Crazy to think there could be
five 4-3 teams in the East after next week’s
games.
5. Co’s Pro’s
Big Al leads the last 4-2 team in
the traffic jam atop the East. If I plotted
out your weekly scores the graph would look
like my EKG during acute AFib. Stop getting
cute at QB you can take the East. Nix is a
backup, always will be. It would also go a
long way if Chuba Hubbard kneecaps Dowdle
this week
6. Buffalo 66
I hate that I’m ranking 4 East teams
consecutively, but Dan’s got back-to-back
wins and gaining momentum in a very tight
race in the East. Let’s not forget, only
lost by 1 point to rival Co’s Pros. Dan’s
just hoping Klein waits till 5pm Sunday to
submit his lineup.
7. Cellmates
Your WRs are failing you and the
reason you’ll float around the middle of the
pack the rest of season. That and you
waffling at QB. Just start Dak and enjoy his
pitch-and-catch w/Pickens.
8. Terry Schiavos
Enjoy 4-2 while you can. Less than
70 points last 3 of 4 games is not a
sustainable strategy. You owe me lunch for
starting an inactive kicker.
9.
TBD
Lots of talent on this roster just
in bad circumstances. Tough division too.
Look forward to 2026 when Caleb gains even
more confidence. Wilson gets a new QB/coach.
Bowers heals up. Boutte looking better and
better. In the meantime, do NOT take any
calls from Romey or Sardina.
10. Bohemians
3-3 and in desperate need of a win
against a division rival…and lucky me gets
to start Trevor Lawrence at Wembley Stadium.
I already know how this plays out. Make some
room Oat, I’m working my way down to ya.
11. EndZone Animals
I’m still in therapy from seeing
that photo AC circulated last week. Middle
of your roster is going to need some serious
long term help. But for this year EA still
has a chance to push for a wildcard spot.
Just don’t lose this week.
12.
Utter Dominance
Only cuz you are not 0-6. Sell JJ
and build this roster out or it’s going to
get real bad, real fast.
13. Goats
Give Oat some love damnit. Darnold
doing great and if only Barkley didn’t have
8 thousand carries in 2024, he’d have some
gas in the tank for this year. LOVE T
Warren…very jealous.
14. Goodfellas
Relax, this was inevitable. Just
enjoy the experience. Maybe invite Roberts
and Oat over for some good old fashioned
jello wrestling. Build around Daniels.